Even if you found your date on an app where you specified that you’re looking for a man or a woman, it’s still polite to ask your date how they gender identify.If you really want to score points, describe your sexual orientation by making a hyphenate with the word “flexible.” But be sure to keep your class-, ableness-, or cis-privilege in check.Dating here has evolved into an app-based texting platform where algorithms are our matchmakers, the vast majority of dating communication happens over the texts, DMs, and IMs of a zillion redundant messaging apps, and actual face time is an incredibly rare occurrence. city complain about dating -- when’s the last time you heard someone say, “I am quite satisfied with the dating pool and its behavior in this town?" -- but SF has its own unique quirks when it comes to dating, hooking up, and getting down.But the first real act of intimacy in San Francisco is “graduating” from OKCupid, Tinder, or Grindr and giving that match your phone number for non-app-based communication.The once-pedestrian act of sharing phone numbers is the new “show me yours, I’ll show you mine” -- an act of trust that indicates an escalation of romantic interest.
Only in San Francisco can the 13th-largest US city by population be considered a “small town.” Yet this is somehow paradoxically true in our fair city, where an incestuous little community of available singles is generally interconnected with fewer than three degrees of separation.Others, well, they just lack the savoir-faire to charm a woman.Whether you fall in category A or B, you should never be discouraged.The bizarre realities of the San Francisco tech boom create some serious Charles Dickens “best of times, worst of times” paradoxes.You will date people far more accomplished and successful than anyone you’d meet in your hometown, but they’re still having a harder time making ends meet than your back-east counterparts.San Francisco is a place where adults have toys and action figures on their desks at work, where grown-ups put on onesies and ride Big Wheels, and where it is considered therapeutically appropriate to have a sense of adult play. Joe Kukura is a freelance writer for Thrillist, which is another way of saying that Joe Kukura has Peter Pan Syndrome.You can swipe him on Twitter at @Exercising Drunk, on OKCupid at @Hunky Spinster, and on Tinder by just swiping and swiping until his profile appears.Being divorced for several years, I have tried my hand at online dating, experimenting with a number of different sites, and I know from experience that for someone new to the process, it can be rather intimidating and confusing.You might be wondering which site is best for you, and if you should bother paying for a membership or not.Every dating website or app has users who fudge a little bit on their age, height, or how recently the photographs were taken.However, levels of outright falsehoods and fiction run highest on Grindr, where exaggerated genital size or use of other people’s pictures is so rampant that a Grindr users aren’t the only single (or non-monogamous, this is the Bay after all) folks guilty of fudging the truth.