I have NEVER found teenagers sexually or romantically attractive, not even when I was one. I liked people who had at least most of their shit together. Anyone who likes and respects you enough to treat you well will also want to (not just be willing to, but WANT to) obey the law of the land.
Fact the third: you might “grow into” the men you like. BECAUSEFact the fourth: the idea that a nice, kind, respectful, worthwhile older man will be interested in and date a teenager is a FANTASY.
Those were the days when men joked about bedding teenagers and the concept of consent was rarely discussed.
Lori Maddox, who lost her virginity to Bowie when she was 15, still maintains it was the greatest night of her life, though Mandy Smith, who was 14 when she began dating the Rolling Stone Bill Wyman, has talked about depression and having had her childhood stolen.
Most importantly, the law is now frequently (but not always) being enforced.It won’t stop once she is “of age” either, though I can only pray that this will be the extent of her dealings with creeps who are old enough to know better.It’s only when we are older that we begin to understand these exchanges between young girls and older men, the power play at the heart of them and the damage that can be done.I remember what it was like to be young and “on the cusp”.When I was in my early to mid-teens, this meant, to some of the men I encountered, I was “not quite legal” or, as many preferred, “jailbait”.There is, of course, a world of difference between a man who grooms and abuses children and one with a predilection for younger women.The law has provided a line in the sand, and that line is 16.Long before she is 16 and thus, in the eyes of the law, “legal”, she’ll be leered at on the bus and chatted up by men five, 10, perhaps even 15 years her senior.Post-puberty, her school uniform will prompt heckling from louts in vans.I was more preoccupied with what I saw: worldliness, sophistication, a gateway to adulthood.None of these interactions became physical, which, looking back, was probably because I liked the idea rather than the reality. My interest in older men started to wane when one of my parents’ friends tried to grope me behind a door at a party. I look at my daughter now and I know what lies ahead.